New UK Cinema Releases: 27th April 2012, AVENGERS ASSEMBLE and STRIPPERS vs WEREWOLVES

Well, it’s Friday and as always I’m here with all the latest UK cinema releases. It would seem that many movie companies have simply not bothered this week and with very good reason too. Today sees the UK release of Avengers Assemble better known as the Avengers, it's had to change its name here in the UK due to the original Avengers movie
being released here some time ago, or at least that’s what I think Mark Ruffalo (The Hulk) told Graham Norton last Friday night.

As you’ve probably guessed from those first few lines the first movie and only one I’ll be covering in any detail this week is The Avengers, I’m going to call it that because in all honesty I think Avengers Assemble sounds terrible, nothing like a movie title, more like something Sam L, leader of S.H.I.E.L.D will be shouting during the movie. Anyway The Avengers stars Robert Downey Jr, Chris Evans, Mark Ruffalo, Chris Hemsworth, Scarlett Johansson, Jeremy Renner, Samuel L Jackson and Gwenyth Paltrow, an impressive list I’m sure you’ll agree.

S.H.I.E.L.D is the worlds leading peace keeping agency lead by director Nick Fury (Samuel L Jackson), his only super power that I know of is that he’s so mother f**king cool. Any how World peace is about to be interrupted by some dude named Loki (Tom Hiddilston) and Nick Fury is forced to “Assemble” a group of superhero’s including Iron Man, Captain America, Hawkeye, Black Widow and The Hulk in order to help keep the peace, check out the trailer and let me know what you think and indeed if you already have your movie ticket ordered.

You know me I’m no fan of comic books, can’t say I’ve ever read one. I only figured out who S.H.I.E.L.D were when I watched Iron Man 2, I’ve never seen Captain America, don’t know who either Hawkeye or BlackWidow (other than seeing Scarlett in Leather for Iron Man 2) are, and I’ve only seen the Lou Ferrigno and Eric Bana versions of the Hulk. Let’s just leave it with I’m not authority on anything to do with Marvel comics but I do want to see what all the fuss is about and watch this movie.

Now, as I explained above not really much else out this week and let’s face it you only came here to read my witty humour and check out The Avengers trailer, right? So, in order to release a movie the same week as that one above you better come up with a good name that captures peoples imaginations, some options (also released this week) Damsels in Distress, Albert Nobbs and The Monk, they don’t quite cut it do they? So they came up with Strippers vs Werewolves. Now, as you’d imagine I’m a guy so naturally I’m going to click on anything that says strippers, especially if the word “male” doesn’t come before it. In this case clicking will be as far as I go, I can’t even be bothered to give you the synopsis of this crappy cheap as shit movie. So, instead just watch the trailer have a laugh and then go back to the top and watch how people go about making a proper movie.